MISSION: INSUFFERABLE

June 30th, 2006 Jemmy Button

GOOD MORNING, MR. FILKS. ONE OF OUR TOP AGENTS, Codename ‘Cora Tunnel’, has recently filed a profoundly disturbing report entitled Codpiece: The Protocols of the Elders of Darwin. Her account, now published under statutory provisions of the Freedom of Misinformation Act, chillingly reveals the existence of a brutal junta, relentless in its quest to extirpate morality and presiding over the most vile and ruthless conspiracy ever devised since the creation of the world late in the evening of October 4^th, 4004 BC.

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The Malthus Falcon (Chapter 1)

June 28th, 2006 Jemmy Button

IT WAS AN HOUR before lunch, but I didn’t have a client and there was nowhere to look for one. So I put my feet on my desk, pulled a bottle out of the bottom drawer and poured a slug of bourbon into my coffee cup. From the window, the Golden Gate was half-hidden in the dirty fog, the thin sunlight falling on my desk was sliced to ribbons by the Venetian blinds. I lit up a Camel, watched the smoke rise languidly until it hit the ceiling fan, then started to study the racing form. I was thinking about placing a punt on a filly in the 12:40 Santa Anita Handicap when the door opened.

She was blonde and slim and her legs held my eyes like two long strips of flypaper curling out from a little black cocktail dress they’d ban in Boston. This was a doll with the kind of looks to give you the KO punch in the first round.
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A Look at Creation “Science” — Part I

June 22nd, 2006 Bones

THIS IS THE FIRST OF A CONTINUING SERIES examining what is being passed off as science on creationist websites.

The following are the concluding paragraphs from an article titled The non-transitions in ‘human evolution’–on evolutionists’ terms, by John Woodmorappe. This article is posted on the answersingenesis.org website.

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Take your beating like an Ann…

June 14th, 2006 Black Ops

IN CASE YOU THOUGHT we were being unusually cruel or unkind in our mocking of Coulter’s latest excreta, confirmation of our take comes from the inimitable Right Wing Professor, in his review of Godless:

One of the curious things about book reviewing is that it’s harder to review a bad book than a good one, and Ann Coulter’s Godless is a really bad book. It shows all the signs of having been hastily written, it’s poorly researched, tendentious, and full of falsehoods, half-truths and distortions.

And those are the parts he liked.

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InANNities, Part II

June 14th, 2006 Black Ops

THE EVOLUTIONISTS’ PROOF is their capacity to concoct a story. They say the whale “evolved” when a bear fell into the ocean. The bat “evolved” when squirrels developed flaps that helped them leap longer distances and fall to the ground more slowly. This isn’t a joke.

– Godless, pp. 228-229

Oh, it’s a joke alright. Unfortunately, the joke’s on Ann.

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InANNities, Part I

June 13th, 2006 Black Ops

THERE IS NO REASON TO EXPECT, for example, that the first place our eyes ever appeared was on the front of our faces. Why don’t we have ancestors with eyes on the bottom of their feet, on their arms, or on top of their heads? Eyes might be best positioned in the front of our heads, but eyes on the bottom of our feet are better than no eyes all, and so should have stuck around at least for a while in the fossil record. But they’re not there.

– Godless, p. 218

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No Glowing Reviews for Coulter’s take on Chernobyl

June 7th, 2006 Central Archivist

ANN COULTER’S NEW BOOK, Godless: The Church of Liberalism, hit the bookstores yesterday and is certain to be a bestseller.  Many of you will have yet to receive your copies (provided you actually spent money on this drivel); however, an excerpt of the first chapter of the book was published at townhall.com Tuesday.  It should give you an idea of what a howler this book is. 

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Never Let the Facts Get in the Way of a Good Story

June 6th, 2006 Black Ops

WELL, HERE IT IS, the sixth of June already, and that means a couple of things to us here at Darwin Central. We’re a few short weeks from the official beginning of summer. Some awful movie is opening today, taking full advantage of the 6/6/06 hype. Oh yeah, and an equally awful book is being released today. Awful for different reasons than the movie, to be sure, but awful nonetheless.

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“…a once proud conservative magazine…”

June 6th, 2006 Black Ops

SO REPORTS OUR OWN eye in the sky, the inimitable Right Wing Professor, in his review of the review — a meta-review, if you will — of Ann Coulter’s latest core dump, “Godless”. To wit:

RWP weeps for the demise of Human Events, a once proud conservative magazine, which like so much of the right seems to have turned to anti-intellectualism and bomb throwing.

Indeed. And these are the folks who would have you believe that they’re the intellectual heirs of such giants as Oakeshott, Hayek, Friedman, Kirk. We think not. “Anti-intellectualism”, with a populist bent, covers it quite nicely. We are at least relieved that another giant, Ronald Wilson Reagan, is no longer around to see what’s become of his favorite magazine.

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Pied Pipers At The Gates Of Dawn

June 2nd, 2006 midwifetoad

MIDWIFE TOAD HAS BEEN A BUSY LITTLE HOPPER. Afflicted with terminal ADD, he has been indulging his latest whim, which is none other that finding the world’s worst web site. This is a tall order, considering the candidates include such paragons as The Time Cube. But the criterion for worst must sink beneath sublime derangement. Toad favors amnesty for undocumented intellectuals. To qualify as the worst, a site must be positively harmful.

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